What's the first thing a new private pilot wants to do after successfully completing the checkride and receiving a temporary airman certificate? Take the most important person in his or her life up for a ride. The next flight might be an invitation to fly to a nearby airport for lunch or to a weekend getaway. The urge to share the adventure of flying in a small aircraft is irresistible and the opportunities limitless, at least in the pilot's mind. And who better to share it with than the people you love?
The rose-hued image of pilot and loved one happily walking hand-in-hand to the waiting airplane is attractive; but for some, the reality turns out to be a gloomier shade of gray. The fact is, lots of pilots discover that their love of flying is a solo passion. Instead of being an enthusiastic passenger, the pilot's partner is either reluctant or flat out unwilling to ride shotgun.
You can't blame them. Handling the controls, making the decisions, commanding the flight — that's the fun stuff. But passengers in light airplanes may feel that they have little choice but to sit and try to enjoy the view even as they're assaulted by an environment filled with noise; vibration; turbulence; and a bewildering collection of switches, dials, and gauges.
Overstated, perhaps. Perhaps not. For a variety of reasons — the physical discomfort of a small airplane cabin compared with a modern automobile interior, a total lack of knowledge about how to control an airplane, unnerving "air pockets," concern about personal safety, or a combination of all of the above — many people are simply not at ease in a light airplane. If your partner or other people in your family are members of that club, you face a challenge.
Understanding their reluctance or fears certainly helps, but it's difficult for a pilot who is head over heels into flying to truly understand how someone could not be as enthusiastic. In lieu of understanding, acceptance of the situation will suffice. That buys the most important and effective tool that you, and they, can use to try to change their perspective: time.
Given the time, a skeptic may take the opportunity to learn more about flying, to become more objective about the thought of being a passenger, and to identify a reason to give it a try.
Such was the case with my wife. She has long been a reluctant passenger. She's subject to motion sickness in a car if she's not driving, so an airplane that moves about all the axes presents even more of an equilibrium problem for her. There's also an element of fear to her reluctance. I don't take it personally — she genuinely trusts my ability and judgment as a pilot. Besides, she dislikes riding in any kind of airplane, not just a small single.
Over time, however, she's managed to come to terms with her attitude about flying and now travels with me on occasion. It's far from fun for her, but she sees the practicality of going by general aviation. Our airplane takes us places to which we want or need to go, with far more flexibility (timing of the travel, choice of destinations, and changes in the itinerary) — and, given our party of three (including our 9-year-old son), often at less cost than a commercial airline.
My wife, bless her, has endured nine-hour flying days in a Cessna 172 — and even a couple of 6.5-hour nonstop flights in a long-range Bonanza, because we were headed to her favorite place in the world. We've flown at night, and in weather, to family functions and business meetings. We may differ on the rationale for choosing a small airplane as the preferred mode of transportation for a particular trip — I enjoy flying for flying's sake, while she focuses on what's at the destination — but we agree that in certain situations, flying ourselves is the way to go.
We've made two long round trips in the last month. On the first, she sat in back and read. My ace copilot son shared cockpit duties with me. On the next trip, she surprised me by asking to sit up front. This didn't make my son happy, but I jumped at the request. It was a night flight of just under four hours, and we spent much of the time going over the cockpit in detail. She wanted to know what the instruments and gauges and controls do and how they work. I was eager to explain. On the return leg, she took her customary seat in the back and finished her book.
I saw the trips as a breakthrough. Sure, she's been on lots of flights with me, but these were different. She appeared more at ease and was more interested in the mechanics of flying than ever before. I began to comment that she had even begun to enjoy flying. I fantasized about all the weekend trips we could make now that she had come around to my way of thinking.
Later, when the initial excitement passed and I could think more clearly, I realized that she hadn't suddenly become an enthusiastic passenger. Even so, a fundamental shift in her attitude has occurred. She's grown more accustomed to flying, more relaxed in the airplane. Most significant is that she's said that she'd like to learn the basics of actually flying the airplane. She's quick to emphasize that she has no interest in earning a pilot certificate. It's just that she gets bored on our long flights, and flying the airplane would give her something more interesting to do than pass the time in the back seat.
She may never be an enthusiastic passenger, but she goes just the same. In time, she's made progress in overcoming her reluctance to the point where she now is interested in handling the controls. I respect and admire her for the effort that she's made to come to terms with my passion for flying.
There's one other reason she's given for enduring what for her can still be an unpleasant experience. "I do this because I love you," she said. I'll settle for that any day.
