Find your support system

She had been a flight attendant for the past decade before making the switch. Before that, she had been a track star. You could still see it in her, in that capable way athletes carry themselves, like she was ready to maybe jump over the airplane flat-footed or sprint across the ramp at any second. Rachel learned something important from her track years that she carried into aviation. No matter what challenge you are facing, find your support system. It may feel like you have to handle everything on your own, but someone always shows up if you just keep looking.

Growing up, Rachel’s favorite race was the 400-meter sprint. (No, it’s not an actual sprint, but it sure as heck feels like one to anyone who has put themselves through that particular brand of torture.) Rachel would always start to lose steam around the 300-meter mark, so that’s where her dad, Melvin, would stand. Right outside the gate. She knew she could count on hearing his voice there: Dig. Dig. Dig. You’ve got this. Keep going. For one race, Melvin wasn’t able to make it, so he asked a friend to stand at the 300-mark in his place. Fast forward 10 years to Rachel’s aviation race. Melvin has passed away, but there are others who stand in his place now. Rachel has her mother and husband who proofread all the scholarship essays, attend the aviation networking galas, and show up on checkride day. And there have been strangers too. One of those, Brenda Hammerton, owned our flight school where Rachel was taking her private pilot knowledge test. Rachel was visibly nervous, so Brenda provided the test-day encouragement and a big celebratory hug after the passing score, congratulating Rachel and telling her she’d see her for the next one. And the spirit of Melvin lives on. You’ve got this. Keep going. “Mom,” Rachel said on the phone later that day, “you wouldn’t believe this nice lady I just met….”

Brenda, although not a pilot herself, managed to support generations of aspiring pilots for as long as I had the privilege of knowing her. She had four children of her own but was really a mother to all. She cried with and for all the flight school students. You just did your first solo? Happy tears. You just failed your checkride? Tearful sympathy hug. Just met you, and finding out you’ve traveled a long way from home to do flight training? Tears. You must be lonely. Come to my house. I’ll make you dinner.

When I was a brand-new flight instructor, the flight school where I worked had shut down because of financial mismanagement. Brenda and her husband, Ken, owned the other flight school on the field, and they hired as many of us as they could. Later, when I got my hours to go work for the regional airline in town, Brenda and Ken made calls and wrote me recommendation letters. And when I decided the airline life wasn’t for me, they hired me back with open arms, encouraging me to step up as their assistant chief, then chief instructor when the time came. Although I wasn’t facing the unique challenge that flight students face, I was raising three children and working full time. Brenda saw a woman in need of support and made me dinner every week. Without fail, she’d send me home with a casserole or an aluminum container of her French onion chicken to pop in the oven. Mama Brenda has since died, and it feels like the life has gone right out of the flight school. There is a big hole where Brenda—and her tears—used to be. But if we’ve learned anything from Brenda and Melvin, we know that someone else will come along, never to replace, but to simply carry the torch. And they will stand alongside the next generation of newbie students here, guiding, encouraging, cooking, maybe crying from time to time.

We know that someone else will come along, never to replace, but to simply carry the torch.

Whatever it is you’re facing, earning a pilot rating, trying to get that aviation dream job, raising a family, running a race, don’t forget to find the helpers. They’re out there. And while you’re at it, maybe turn around and invest in someone else’s success. You don’t have to be an expert. Brenda wasn’t a pilot, but there are a whole lot of pilots who would not be flying if not for her. Melvin wasn’t a runner, but he had the right encouragement for Rachel, and maybe for all of us too. You’ve got this. Keep going.

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